The Manual: A Philosopher’s Guide to Life
Stoicism doesn’t mean repressing emotion and shunning pleasure, in essence is about focusing on what is in our power and letting go of everything we can’t control.
Within our power are our own thoughts and actions. Outside our power is everything else.
Within our sphere of control, we are naturally free, independent, and strong. Beyond that sphere, we are weak, limited and dependent.
If you wish to have peace and contentment, release your attachment to all things outside your control.
Whenever distress or displeasure arises in your mind, remind yourself “This is only my interpretation not reality itself”. Then ask whether it falls within our outside your sphere of power. And, if it is beyond your power to control, let it go.
If you try to avoid what you cannot control, sickness, poverty, death, you will inflict useless mental suffering upon yourself.
End the habit of despising things that are not within your power, and apply your aversion to things that are within your power. As for desire, for now it is best ot avoid it altogether.
Remind yourself of the true nature of things, objects, and beings that delight your mind.
For your favourite cup, remember that is only a cup.
When embracing your wife or child, remember that they are mortal beings.
For any action, remind yourself of the nature of the action.
Remind yourself of the usual incidents that happen. You will not be disturbed if you are prepared for such things.
Remain in harmony with the nature of things. I cannot get upset by things beyond my control.
People are not disturbed by things themselves, but by the views they take of those things. The fear of death stems form the view that it is fearful.
People who are ignorant of philosophy blame others for their own misfortunes. Those who are beginning to learn philosophy blame themselves. Those who have mastered philosophy blame no one.
Do not take satisfaction in possessions and achievements that are not your own.
What, then, is your own? The way you live your life.
Remain steadfast in pursuing your mission, always willing to shed distractions.
Do not wish that all things will go well with you, but that you will go well with all things.
The only thing that can impede your will is your will itself.
Whenever a challenge arises, turn inward and ask what power can you exercise in the situation.
If you meet temptation, use self-control; if you meet pain, use fortitude; if you meet revulsion, use patience.
Do not say of anything “I have lost it”, but rather “I have given it back”.
For as long as the Source entrusts something to your hands, treat it as something borrowed, like a traveller at an inn.
It is better to die poor, while free from fear and grief, than to live surrounded by riches and filled with anxiety.
Do not strive to be celebrated for anything.
It is no easy feat to hold onto your inner harmony while collecting accolades.
If you wish to be free, do not desire anything that depends on another. lest you make them your master.
Think of life as a banquet. If a dish is handed to you, sample it with gratitude. If you’re waiting for a particular platter to come around, be patient. If it passes you by, don’t complain.
When you see a person weeping with grief, remind yourself “What upsets this person is their opinion on what has happened”.
Do not share these thoughts, sympathise with them, even cry with them. Your tears ill be outward, not inward.
Think of life as a play, and yourself as an actor. Play your part to the best of your ability.
You cannot choose but to act well in your given role.
Distinguish between reality and interpretation. All signs point to good luck, if I interpret them that way.
If you make peace with all things that are beyond your power, refusing to fight them, you will be invincible.
There is no room for envy or aping others. Desire to be free, let go of anything that is not within your control.
When anyone provokes you, remember that it is actually your opinion provoking you.
Remind yourself that you are a mortal being, and someday will die. Do not waste precious time, like stewing over grievances and striving after possessions.
If you intend to follow this path, do not adopt any air of superiority. Mind your own business.
If you find yourself acting to impress others, or avoiding action out of fear of what they might think, you have left the path.
Find satisfaction in following your philosophy. If you want to be respected, start respecting yourself.
Find significance within yourself. Within your own sphere of power.
If you want to acquire riches without losing your honour and self-respect, then do it.
Work to acquire the character of a person who attracts good friends, rather than losing your character to gain riches.
Your position in society is one best suited for your talents, which you can hold with honour. Each person has a vital role in society; you are important right where you are.
If you lose your honour in striving for greater (perceived) significance, you become useless.
If you envy people that attract love because of positive character qualities, be glad for them. If they attract attention because of negative character qualities, be glad you don’t share with them.
Everything has its price. If you have not been invited to a party, it is because you haven’t paid the price of the invitation. It costs social engagement, conversation, encouragement, and praise. If you are not willing to pay this price, do not be upset when you don’t receive an invitation.
You may have something good instead of the invitation, the pleasure of not making small talk within people you don’t really like, not praising someone you don’t admire, etc.
Whenever misfortune befalls you, ask yourself how you would react if it were someone else in the same situation.
If someone tried to take control of your body and make you a slave, you would fight for freedom.
Yet how easily you hand over your mind to anyone who insults you. When you dwell on their words and let them dominate your thoughts, you make them your master.
In every situation consider what comes before, during and after an event.
If you have considered all, and you still want to do it, by all means, begin. Otherwise, you are like a child who daydreams about and acts out to shows with his friends.
If you have fully considered the consequences, and you still wish to make sacrifices, begin.
Whatever your vocation, pursue it wholeheartedly. Consider, choose, and commit.
Duties are determined by relations.
Fulfil your duties to the best of your ability. If someone insults or rejects you, do not stoop to his level and retaliate in anger. Hold securely to your clear conscience and inner harmony.
No one can steal your peace of mind unless you let them.
Stop judging things that fate brings you as “good” or “evil”; only judge your own thoughts, desires and actions as good or evil.
Be mindful of this when you participate in religious services and prayers. In devotion, be neither careless nor extravagant.
When you hear predictions of the future, do not become fearful or excited, remember that future events are beyond your control.
Outside events do not touch your deepest self, what matters is your interpretation and reaction, you an use any circumstance to your benefit.
Be the same person in public as in private.
Speak only what is useful and beneficial. In conversation, avoid idle chatter about horse races, athletes, celebrities, food, and drink. Refuse to participate in gossip, tearing down, inflating, and judging other people. Among friends, shift the conversation to worthy topics; among strangers, stay silent.
Avoid vulgar entertainments.
Take care of your bodily needs, food, drink, clothes, shelter, but avoid luxury and indulgence.
Enjoy sex only within the bounds of your marriage; but do not assume a posture of moral superiority and look down upon those who behave otherwise.
When you attend the games, do not get emotionally invested in the rivalry. Wish only the best team or athlete wins.
When you attend parties, be a polite guest. Do not revel to the point of losing your dignity.
In company, do not prattle on about your own adventures and misadventures. Keep your language free of obscenities. Do not dip into search of cheap laughs.
When you feel burning desire for something, think about yourself as someone under a spell. Instead of acting on impulse, take a step back, wait until the enchantment fades and then see things as they are.
Consider the cost pursuing pleasure, every consequence that may follow, how you will feel about it the next day.
If reason tells you a pleasure is wholesome and harmless, you may enjoy it in moderation. But take care not to let your happiness gradually become dependent on it.
Gaining in self-possession is more satisfying than bodily pleasure.
If you know you are in the right, why fear those who misjudge you?
It is rarely a question of good versus bad, but of weighing greater and lesser goods on a scale of values.
When thinking, watch for obstacles and errors in your line of thought. You don’t want to stumble into illogic and unreason.
Once you let your appetite exceed what is necessary and useful, desire knows no bounds.
Virtue, honour, and self-respect are the marks of true beauty.
Care for your body as needed, but put your main energies and efforts into cultivating your mind.
Gently turn away any insult or injury. “It seems right to them, though they are mistaken”
If a friend treats you unfairly, do not fall for retribution. Instead, reach for the opposite, for reconciliation. The relationship is worth keeping.
A person’s worth, after all, is not found in possessions or style.
Do not mistake your impressions for the whole truth.
Do not proclaim yourself a philosopher, or go around preaching your principles. Show them by example.
At a feast, do not give a speech about how everyone should eat. Only eat as you should.
Do not make a spectacle of self-deprivation. When you fast, tell no one.
An ignorant person is one who is tossed about between elation and despair by external forces and events.
A philosopher is one whose thoughts and emotions are internally anchored.
Those who focus on interpretations are grammarians, not philosophers.
Follow your principles as though they were laws.
You know the necessary principles of philosophy. Choose to act like the worthy and capable person you are. Follow unwaveringly what reason tells you is best course.
The first topic of philosophy is the practical application of principles, like “Do not lie”.
The second topic is understanding the reasons behind principles “Reasons why we should not lie”.
THe third topic is verifying the principles through logic. “What are the consequences of lying? Do we confirm our reasons for not lying? Are our reasons contradictory?”
In most schools of philosophy, they spend all their time on the second and third subjects, arguments and proofs, and neglect entirely the first. They can explain in academic and scholarly terms exactly why lying is wrong, yet they routinely lie.
Philosophy is for living, not just learning.
Lead me, Fate, wherever you will and I will cheerfully follow – Cleanthes
If it pleases the gods, let it be – Socrates
They may kill me, but they cannot hurt me – Socrates